The list.

I have recently made a BIG move....


When I first mentioned to my loved ones I was moving to Cloncurry, it would be safe to say that I received many mixed reactions... 1. "Where?" was the most popular. 2. "Maybe you should visit there first" followed closely in second place.  3. ( My favourite)"You won't be able to wear makeup or dress the way you do" 4. "You'll be so bored"...

Truthfully, I had the same thoughts, plus oodles more.. Will I like my job, will I make friends, how will I survive without shops etc etc. And now that I'm here, I honestly still have the same thoughts. I don't know if I like my job, I havent made many friends, I miss driving my car ( my sweet, loving, bright yellow car), I miss my friends, my family, I miss the beach....I could go on and on.
This was my first big move. I am currently over 1700 kms away from everything and everyone I have ever known.
And I love it.
I'm with the most incredible man I've ever met.
I'm becoming comfortable with who I am.
I'm learning who I am.

For many years I have struggled with my image. I've had many negative and self-loathing thoughts. I don't think I've ever been comfortable and proud of who I am. It wasn't because of who I surrounded myself with. I have incredible, beautiful friends. My mother is devine. My father was sensational. And I have 6 fantastic siblings whom I adore deeply. I lived in the cutest unit in Hawthorne, drove a nice car, wore pretty clothes and had a fantastic job. So why wasn't I happy? And why am I so happy out here without all the things that I based my life on?
Why is it that, finally for once in a very long time, I look at myself in the mirror and I have ZERO hateful thoughts. Why is it that I really love who I am on the inside. How did I suddenly reach this point in my life where I know who I am and what I am about?

It hasn't been easy making this move. Don't get me wrong, I have had some bad, depressive days, you could even say a meltdown, doubting if I made the right decision (never about Francisco, more to do with my job).

So, I asked myself 2 questions : "What is it that I want to achieve" and "how do I want to better myself".
I realised that I do want more in my life than shopping and stimulation from others. I want to be able to spend time with myself and enjoy it. I don't want  to be bored when I'm by myself. I want to come back from this country experience with a love for things other than my boyfriend or my belongings. I honestly wondered if I was a shallow person. I know that I am not. I have a big heart, and I will help anyone. But I realised I wanted a passion and to be good at something other then my job.

My goals this year is to tick off boxes, so to speak. I'm compiling a list. It's still a work in progress, but I will be posting "The List"soon. I'm going to really start looking further into this world, and learn more, eat more, see more and do more.

I guess I can tick off one box already..... I've always wanted to start a blog!

xo Annie